


Living Between the Lines

by LilyK



Category: The Sentinel (TV)
Genre: Angst, Case Fic, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-25
Updated: 2018-09-25
Packaged: 2019-07-17 07:03:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16090496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilyK/pseuds/LilyK
Summary: Naomi's interference in Blair and Jim's lives has dire consequences.





	Living Between the Lines

It was a warm, sunny day when Jim Ellison and Blair Sandburg walked from the elevator into the bullpen, and froze in their tracks. Everyone sat hunched in his or her chair, head down, face red with embarrassment or pale with dismay. It took only a few moments for the confused duo to realize that the reason for the total silence and the looks on their co-workers' faces was that Simon's intercom was on -- obviously unknown to him. 

The voices coming through the speaker in the bullpen were angry and loud. One was Simon's; the other was a woman's. 

_"How many times do I have to insist that you do something about this?"_ the woman shouted. 

_"Exactly what do you expect me to do?"_ Simon answered testily. _"They're grown men. For God's sake, they're two of my best officers! I trust them, and I won't do anything to hurt their careers or their personal relationship!"_

_"I don't give a damn about your fucking pig squad! I want my son out of here now before you and your kind get him killed! To hell with their personal relationship! I can't believe you condone this behavior!"_

_"Your son is a grown man, Ms. Sandburg. He can make his own decisions."_

Jim and Blair stood rooted in place. Blair's face turned a deathly shade of white and he began to shake with shock and rage. 

"Naomi?" Blair whispered, his voice low and angry. 

_"Besides,"_ Naomi continued, _"I happen to know that it's against policy for two people who are fucking to be partners! It's dangerous for my son! Ellison will get him killed and it will be on your head!"_

Simon growled, _"Sandburg and Ellison are an excellent team! They are fully trained and very competent. Their private lives are not my concern."_

Jim turned to reach out a hand toward his partner, but Blair was already moving. He crossed to Simon's office and without knocking, shoved the door open with full force. He strode into the room, oblivious to the stunned gazes of his boss and his mother. 

Trembling with anger, Blair walked up to his mother and stopped inches away from her. "Get out."

"Blair! Please!" Naomi stammered, her eyes wide with distress. 

With his gaze riveted on Naomi, he said in a low voice, "Captain, your intercom is on."

"Oh, shit. You mean-!" Simon dove for the intercom button, then sank back into his seat. Running a hand down his face, he said, "I'm so sorry. I didn't know." 

Blair's gaze never left Naomi's face when he said, "It's not your fault, Captain. It's hers." He nodded toward his mother. After a long pause, he finally said, "I want you to leave. Now."

"Blair, I can explain!" Naomi said tearfully. 

"I don't care to listen to you." He gave Naomi a dismissive look before he turned to Banks. "If you can spare me for an hour or so, Captain, I'd like to go to lunch."

"Blair," Simon said quietly, "take the rest of the day off."

Sighing deeply, Blair shook his head. "Thanks, Simon. That won't be necessary. I have work to do. I'll be at my desk in an hour. Thank you, sir." Raising his head high, Blair walked from the office. When he passed by his partner, Jim started to move toward him. Blair held up a hand and gave a small shake of his head as he passed by. 

\------------------------------

Ignoring Naomi, who ran after Blair, frantically calling his name, and unsure exactly what to do, Jim glanced at Simon as he slowly walked toward him. Simon waved a hand toward Jim, his face showing his distress. 

"Go after him, Jim. I don't want him doing anything rash. We'll talk in my office later. Both of you."

"Yes, sir," Jim answered and followed Naomi and Blair. 

Tuning in to his partner's rapid heart rate and respiration, Jim tracked Blair to the second floor men's locker room. He could hear Naomi calling Blair's name from the hallway, but there was no answer from his partner. He exited the elevator and walked toward where Naomi hovered, incessantly tapping on the door. Jim was almost surprised that she had bothered to stop in the hallway. Usually Naomi followed her own rules, and a small sign indicating that this was the men's locker room normally wouldn't have stopped the pushy woman. 

Naomi spotted Jim immediately. Jim certainly wasn't in the mood for a confrontation. His anger bubbled right below the surface and a wrong word or look from his lover's mother would have him exploding in seconds. He was more worried about his partner right now, so he disregarded her red eyes and flushed face as he stepped around her. 

Jim wasn't surprised, though, when at the last moment, Naomi stepped in front of him. 

"You'll kill my son, you bastard."

"I'd die for him," Jim said sharply. 

"It's all your fault. First you drag him around for three years, then you get him kicked out of school...!" 

Jim took a step toward Naomi. He felt a stab of satisfaction at the sudden fear reflected in her eyes as he towered over her, and almost laughed in disgust when her mouth opened and closed, but no words escaped. 

"I love Blair," he said deliberately, anger threatening to erupt. He forced the fury down for the moment. "Your idea of history seems to be greatly revised in your favor. You think I'll get Blair killed? What about his soul? What about his life? You killed his heart, Naomi. You've interfered once too often and you've hurt him deeply. Now get out of my way." 

With tears flowing down her cheeks, Naomi swallowed hard. Jim could hear her throat clicking dryly, and she stepped aside quickly. Still, she managed to whisper, "It's all your fault." 

"You need to leave." Jim pushed the door open. 

"He's my son," Naomi said, her tone clearly conveying that the fact she was Blair's mother explained everything, forgave her all. 

Jim stopped. Shrugging his shoulders, he answered, "It wasn't supposed to be a contest between us, but you've turned it into one. Now, after what you've just done, I wonder if he's better off without a mother like you. You've put his career in jeopardy. Worse, you stupid woman, you've endangered his life." Jim sighed deeply; his shoulders slumped for a moment. "I'll take care of him. You've really done it this time, Naomi." He released the door and it closed in her face with a soft whoosh. 

\-------------------------------------------------

After checking to be sure the rest of the locker room was vacant and after sliding the door's lock, Jim cleared his throat to announce his presence to his distraught partner, who sat very still on one of the hard, wooden benches placed between the rows of metal lockers. 

"Chief?"

Blair sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. Turning distraught eyes toward Jim, he nodded. "Jim." 

"You okay?"

"No."

Jim sat down. "I know." He put a reassuring hand on Blair's leg, hoping to offer comfort, but he wasn't surprised when Blair reacted immediately. 

Blair rose and glared down at his partner. "Damn it, Jim! Do you know what she's done? Nobody's ever going to leave you alone now! Every fucking prejudiced person in the entire police department will be hassling you. They'll remember the Sentinel shit from two years ago, and this will add more fuel to the fire!" 

"Please, just calm down. I'll be fine. It's you I'm worried about."

"Me?" Blair looked genuinely puzzled. "Fuck, Jim. Nobody cares a rat's ass about me. Hell, man, maybe I should disappear and then this will all blow over. I can't keep you safe like this!" 

Jim stood and grabbed Blair's upper arms. His fingers tightened and in a strangled voice he whispered, "Don't ever say that! Don't! You think you can just leave, and I'll be safe? That I don't care about you? What? Our relationship doesn't mean a thing to you? What about us? I thought you and I..." Jim bit his lower lip, embarrassed at the pleading tone that started to escape. 

Their gazes met, and after Blair scrutinized him intently for a long moment, he gave a small nod. Moving in, he pressed a hand to Jim's chest. "Sorry," he said softly. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. For everything!" With his free hand wrapped around Jim's wrist, he lowered his voice to barely a whisper. "I love you."

With a feeling of great relief, Jim closed his eyes for a moment before he opened them. Leaning down, he put his lips close to Blair's ear. "Me, too, Chief. I love you more than anything. This is just -- a bump in the road. We'll be okay as long as we stick together." His lips barely brushed a spot of warm skin and after pulling back, he gave his partner a small smile, adding, "And we'll talk about -- this, but not here. We need to meet with Simon and then later, tonight at home, we'll decide what to do."

"Do?" Blair asked, clearly confused. 

Jim nodded adamantly. "Yeah, about us, what we'll tell people about us, if anything, and about Naomi."

Shaking his head vehemently, Blair growled, "I don't want to talk to her. Ever again." 

Jim slipped an arm around Blair's shoulders. "You're hurt now, but she is your mother. She's done some really thoughtless things, but she does love you."

Blair shook his head again. "She doesn't respect my decisions nor does she care what I think or how I feel. It's always about her and what she wants or thinks I should want. I'm tired of it."

"I know. But..." 

"No buts. I've made up my mind." 

"Okay. Your decision. But we stick together, right?"

Blair nodded. "Yeah, okay. Together." He gave Jim a half-hearted smile. "Simon is going to kill us." 

Jim gave a crooked grin. "Yeah, I know. But you realize he's known about us for at least twelve months."

"He has?"

"He hasn't said, but he knows. He also knows that you're what grounds my senses and in your own right, you're a hell of a cop. You've proved yourself time and time again."

"What happens if..." 

Jim put a finger on Blair's lips. "No ifs, ands, or buts. We're cops, we're partners, we're lovers. It's a package deal. He takes us the way we are or we find someplace that will. The world's a big place. Plenty of options out there for us. Okay?"

"You'd leave?" Blair said breathlessly. "Quit the force?"

"Of course," Jim said matter-of-factly. "Was there ever a question about you and me and forever, Chief? I thought we had that settled months ago."

Blair shook his head, finally smiling. "No, man, no question. None at all." He shuffled his feet and shoved his hands into his pockets. Giving Jim a shy glance, he said, "Thanks." 

Jim grinned. "Goes both ways, partner. Thank you."

Blair rolled his eyes. "You are so easy." 

Jim chuckled. "I'll remind you of that later tonight."

"Cool." Blair glanced at the door and his eyes clouded over. "Is she gone?"

Turning, Jim paused before he said, "Yeah. Come on, the captain doesn't like to be kept waiting." 

"Lead on, partner. Our firing squad awaits." 

\-------------------------------------------------

Blair raised an eyebrow at Jim, who smiled reassuringly at him as he knocked on the captain's office door. 

"Come!" 

Jim opened the door and waited a moment for Simon's beckoning wave before he entered, followed by his partner. 

"Sit." 

Once they'd taken seats, Simon pushed a file across his desk. Jim flipped through the pages. 

Simon said, "We have a couple of missing containers of heavy-duty equipment from Pier 17. The owner says that the ship was fully loaded two nights ago and was set to sail this morning. Now it's missing about $500,000 in cargo." 

"Captain?" Blair asked, surprised at the topic of conversation. 

"Yes, Sandburg?"

"Did you want to talk about what happened?"

Drawing on his cigar, Simon leaned back in his chair and puffed contentedly for a few moments before he blew out a cloud of smoke. Looking directly at Blair, he said, "No."

"I think I should apologize," Blair said. 

"No need," Simon responded, "although you should know that Ms. Sandburg is now restricted to the visitors' lounge on the first floor. I've instructed security that she's not to be given a pass to the rest of the building." 

Blair sat up straight. "That's it? You're not firing me? This morning was my fault. I've embarrassed the department and my partner." He gave Jim a quick glance. 

Jim closed the file and set it down on the edge of the desk. "Chief..." 

"Gentlemen." Simon held up a hand. "It's okay, Jim." Smiling, he continued. "You aren't fired, Sandburg. You're working. On that case, in fact," he added, pointing toward the file folder. “The incident wasn't your fault. If anything, it's mine. Not unless you asked your mother to make an ass of herself in front of the entire department."

"But I thought..." Blair sputtered, "Jim and I-" 

"You, Detective Sandburg," Simon interrupted, "and your partner, have always conducted yourselves in a professional manner in this department. You do your job, and you do it very well. That's all I care about." Simon rose and pointed toward the door. "Work, gentlemen. That's what you're paid for. I don't have time to sit and visit." 

Blair ducked his head and breathed deeply. Rising, he turned to Simon and said, "Thank you, Captain."

"Out. And take your silent partner with you." 

With the sound of Simon's deep chuckle following them from the room, Jim and Blair quickly left before their boss changed his mind. 

\-------------------------------------------------

"What the fuck?" Jim growled, eying his truck parked in the far corner of the parking garage. 

"Oh, shit," Blair sighed, too emotionally exhausted at the moment to manage more than a tired comment. 

"It's started already." 

"Yeah. Sorry, Jim." 

"It's not your fault some asshole slashed the tires. Don't take on more than your share of guilt." At Blair's raised eyebrow, Jim shrugged. "Simon told me that once. I wish I had taken his advice more often." 

Blair gave Jim a rueful smile. "Don't we all." 

"What?"

"Wish we had taken good advice, man. We all wish we had with hindsight." 

Jim circled the truck, shaking his head in exasperation. "Getting philosophical here, aren't we, Chief?"

Shrugging, Blair said, "I'm tired. It makes me introspective."

Sympathetically, Jim gave a small 'humph' before shaking his head again. "Yeah, I know. Let's see if we can get a loaner from the duty sergeant. I need to call the auto club and get the truck towed to a garage for new tires. Then, since this happened on department property, I need to fill out a report for IA. Better call my insurance agent, too," he added to the list while he rubbed his forehead. 

Blair put a hand on Jim's arm. "You make the calls. I'll sign out for the loaner and start on the IA report."

"Deal. Thanks."

"Hey, man. That's what partners are for."

"Damn straight."

Looking at each other, they finally grinned. "Not any more," Blair quipped, earning him a playful swat on the arm from his partner. 

\-------------------------------------------------

After several phone calls, two reports, and the beginning of a grand larceny investigation at the docks, Jim and Blair reached home in the wee hours of the morning. 

Sighing, Jim put his head back on the loaner car's headrest and groaned. "I'm tired, hungry and need a shower." 

"Huh?" Blair murmured sleepily when Jim reached out and gently shook his shoulder. "We home?"

"That's our building. So yeah, we're home. Let's go and take a shower, have a bite and sleep for two days. I'm beat." 

Holding up the take-out bag from Taco Bell, Blair said, "This doesn't sound all that good, man, but I'm hungry. Too bad nothing else is open on this side of town after midnight." 

"It'll do for tonight." Turning tired eyes to his mate, Jim smiled. "I'll share the shower with you."

"That's an offer I can't refuse. Then at least one good thing will have happened today." 

Opening his door, Jim exited the vehicle and waited in front of it for Blair. Slinging an arm around his partner's shoulders, Jim gave him a quick hug. "You're always a good thing, Chief." 

Blair smiled. "Thanks. Love you, too." 

Together they entered the building. Jim punched the elevator button and after much creaking and groaning of the cables, the doors slid open with a screech. Jim flinched. 

"Man, that hurt my ears. Geez, Jim, you okay?" Blair inquired. 

Running a finger around the inside of an ear, Jim nodded. "Remind me to lube that damn thing the first chance I get."

"It needs dynamite, not lube." 

Chuckling, Jim entered the elevator and tugged on Blair's shirt sleeve, drawing him close. Wrapping an arm around Blair's shoulders, he kissed his lover's lips lightly. Pulling back from the kiss when the elevator stopped on the third floor, Jim's arm tightened. "I needed that." 

Blair smiled and leaned against Jim for a moment before they walked toward the door to the loft. "Any kiss from you is needed. Not to mention fun. I-" 

Both men stopped and stared before exchanging tight-lipped looks.

"Fuck," Blair muttered, seeing the door to their home ajar. 

"Don't tell me..." Jim growled, releasing his lover and pulling his weapon. 

Blair set down the bag of food and pulled his gun. "Do you hear anything?"

"No, but I'm really wiped out. Let's be on the safe side." 

Holding the gun with both hands, he aimed forward and led the way. Transferring the gun to his right hand, he used his left to push the door open the rest of the way. Blair followed closely on Jim's heels when he stealthily entered the apartment. Exchanging glances, Jim flicked his eyes toward the second level. With a nod, Blair went toward the back of the apartment to check his former bedroom, now office space, and the bathroom. 

Jim carefully picked his way over the scattered and broken contents of his and Blair's home. He climbed the stairs quietly, however, a thorough search of the loft revealed no one lurking, but the entire living space was a complete and total shambles. Every drawer and closet had been opened and the contents were strewn hither and yon. The bed had been completely stripped and the mattress cover had been cut into ribbons. 

Glancing over the railing, Jim saw Blair cross the living room and slide open the balcony door. He waited silently while Blair made a quick check of the balcony before returning to the living room, holstering his gun. When he glanced up and met Jim's gaze, he shook his head and raised his hands, palms up. 

Jim nodded and finally took a closer look at the first floor. Meanwhile, Blair walked around, muttering and cursing the absent perpetrator, and asking all the gods of heaven and earth for a bit of divine retribution against the idiot. Jim grimaced as he trotted back down the stairs, kicking several broken pottery pieces out of his way. The sofas had been overturned and slashed as well. Every item on the stereo shelves was smashed or torn. One of Blair's Mayan masks had been thrown through the television screen. Jim sighed tiredly. 

Standing next to Blair, they looked toward the kitchen. The fridge had been opened and the food had been thrown against the cabinets. Every cabinet was open and all of the contents had been flung into the middle of the floor. Even the knobs on the stove had been pried off. 

Blair pulled his cell phone from his pocket and called dispatch. Jim walked around haphazardly, not touching anything of consequence that could be dusted for prints while Blair called in to report the vandalism. 

"A unit's on its way," Blair said. Tight-lipped, Jim nodded. "Whoever did this picked a good time," Blair said bitterly. "The second floor is vacant for renovations, and Bob and Emily are away on vacation, so this floor was unoccupied all day today. Nobody probably heard or saw a thing." Blair said angrily, "Damn it, Jim! What the hell are we going to do?"

"Go to a hotel?"

"You know that's not what I mean!" Blair shouted. 

"Let's face it. Somebody at the department is behind this. Nobody else knows what happened, but the people who were in the bullpen today, or whoever they talked to about it." 

"And it's all my mother's fault. God, I'm so sorry!" 

Grabbing hold of one end of the sofa, Jim said, "Give me a hand here." 

Blair moved forward and together they turned the piece of furniture upright. They took a minute to search out the sofa cushions. Luckily some of them had been slashed only on one side. Jim carefully arranged the cushions and sank down. 

"We need to talk now. Before the investigating unit gets here." Jim patted the seat next to him. 

Blair's shoulders slumped. After closing the front door, he sat on the sofa next to his lover. "So talk," he said shortly. 

"This is not your fault."

"Oh? And just whose fault is it? It was my mother who opened her big mouth and screamed at our boss today, in case you've forgotten," Blair added flippantly. "If she'd have minded her own business, none of this," Blair waved a hand to encompass the disaster that was their home, "would have happened! Get a clue, man. I'm bad news. If anything is going to go wrong, it will have something to do with me! She fucked up our lives with the dissertation and now she's fucked up our lives..." 

Jim clamped strong hands on Blair's upper arms and dragged his partner closer so they were sitting face to face, inches apart. "You are not responsible for your mother's behavior. Do you hear me?" Jim gave Blair a small shake. "Do you?" he demanded. 

"Yeah, I hear you, but I'm not falling for it. It is my fault. Totally. Just like when she got hold of the fucking thesis." 

"Geez, Chief, so what? So she's a pain in the ass. She's not you! You can't control her actions."

"Maybe it's about time I tried. Because, man, if she ever does anything that hurts you, I don't know what I'd do." Groaning, Blair said, "I am so fucked." 

Pulling Blair close, Jim wrapped his arms around the shaking shoulders. "Take a deep breath and relax, my love." When Blair rested his forehead against Jim's shoulder, he kissed the top of the curly head. "We've lived through a lot worse than this. We'll be fine." 

Sighing deeply, Blair hugged Jim tightly. "I don't know why you put up with me. If I were you, I'd toss myself out on my ass." 

Remembering what happened the time that Jim did exactly that, he shuddered. "No," he said softly. "Never. I couldn't handle that again."

Pulling out of the embrace, Blair rested his hands on Jim's chest, his troubled eyes searching Jim's face. "Oh, man. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to drag up old shit. You okay?" 

Giving Blair a half-hearted smile, Jim's fingers gently traced Blair's cheek. "Don't worry. I'm fine. Besides, we have company," he said, cocking a head toward the door. "Would you please let them in so we can get it over with and clean up the worst of the damage?" 

"Sure. For you, anything." Leaning down, he planted a quick kiss on Jim's forehead before he opened the door. 

\-------------------------------------------------

The next morning, the partners slept late, rose and grabbed a quick breakfast on the way to the docks to follow up on a couple of good leads on the theft they were investigating. Several hours of investigation proved fruitful and after a sandwich from the cafe around the corner from the precinct, Jim and Blair settled down at their desks in the bullpen to fill out their reports. After turning in the paperwork to Banks, they headed to the tire store to pick up Jim's truck, returned the loaner car, and then made a trip to Wal-Mart to replace the essentials ruined in the vandalism. Three hundred dollars later, and with the pickup truck bed full of blue bags, Jim and Blair pulled into Jim's usual parking space on Prospect Street. 

Hopping from the truck, both men filled their hands with the plastic bags. 

"Go ahead. Since we can't carry everything in one trip, I'll wait here until you drop your load. I'd really be pissed if somebody ripped us off after we just spent two hours picking out all this stuff."

Jim chuckled. "Getting a bit suspicious of your fellow man, Chief?" 

Blair shrugged. "After the last few days, what did you expect? Better safe than sorry, as they say." 

"Okay. It makes sense. No use looking for more trouble. I'll be right back." 

"Hurry up, man. I'm hungry." 

"Hold your horses," Jim called over his shoulder. "I'll be quick." 

"Yeah, yeah," Blair answered, leaning back against the truck's side panel to wait for his partner to return. Crossing his arms, he scanned left and right to make sure nobody was eying their purchases. He snorted softly at himself. He was acting a bit overly suspicious, but he didn't care. Lately, his luck seemed to have taken a turn for the worse. Sighing, he thought about his lover. Keeping Jim safe was his main concern and so far, other than the vandalism, neither he nor Jim had been threatened physically as a result of Naomi's blunder, but he was taking no chances. 

Jim pushed the glass street-level door open and when Blair's gaze met his, he gave his partner a warm smile. Blair grabbed two handfuls of shopping bags and started across the street. When Blair met Jim about halfway, Jim leaned down and kissed him lightly on the lips. 

"Jim! Somebody will see."

Jim shrugged. "So, let them. I'm tired of hiding our relationship."

"Do you have a death wish?"

"No. Honestly, I'm not going to take out an ad in the Cascade Times, but if I want to give you a kiss or hold your hand, I'm going to do it. If you don't mind, that is." 

Blair couldn't keep the grin from his face. He felt himself blush, but he didn't care. He was proud to be Jim's partner. "I don't mind. In fact, I'm proud to be your partner." 

Nodding, Jim squeezed his lover's shoulder lightly. "Two more trips each, and we'll have it covered. Hurry." Jim swatted Blair's backside, making him bark with laughter and take off at a trot. 

"I'll get you later, man," Blair said under his breath, making Jim chuckle in response. 

\----------------------------------

Jim turned back to the truck, rearranging the bags still left, pulling them to the side of the bed so Blair could easily reach his share. He had just tugged the last bag close when a small sound, much like a baby's cry, reached his ears. Puzzled, Jim turned toward the source of the noise: the alley between his building and the neighboring one. When the cry came again, he didn't even need his Sentinel hearing to follow it. 

He trotted across the street and entered the alley, zeroing on the sound. The rustling in a nearby trashcan caught his attention, and for a second, he panicked, thinking somebody had abandoned a child in the garbage. Quickly, he pulled the lid from the large metal can and peered inside. Adjusting his eyesight to the dark interior, he saw the object of the cries: a rather large, very noisy and obviously frightened Siamese cat. 

"Hey, little guy," Jim crooned, reaching down into the trash. "Who put you in here?" Scratching the furry ears, Jim made small, comforting sounds. Concentrating on the frightened animal, Jim reached in. Before he could scoop up the abandoned creature, a hand gripped his shoulder and fingers dug painfully into his skin, shoving him forward. 

Jim reacted quickly. He started to turn as he brought his arm up, using his forearm to smash into his attacker's arm. The attacker grunted and the grip on Jim's shoulder fell away. Jim spun around and instantly saw a flash of metal. His senses registered the knife that was gripped in a meaty fist. For his size, the man moved swiftly. He slashed out. 

In the confined space, Jim raised his arm, protecting his torso from the blade's bite. Blinding pain when the knife connected caused Jim to stumble backward a few steps. He spared a glance at the wound and swallowed hard. The blood spurted out in a red geyser, and he quickly clamped a hand tightly over the gaping laceration, knowing immediately that his artery had been severed. 

Struggling to focus through the pain, he glanced up and saw his attacker step forward, knife waving menacingly. He knew that the man had the advantage now, yet he refused to give up without a fight. The man moved in for the fatal stab; Jim kicked out. The attacker's grin was feral as he easily eluded Jim's awkward defense. Dizzy now, Jim's vision clouded. The man moved forward. He was surprised that he registered the knife's blade as it glinted in the sunlight. Then the nausea and dizziness washed over him as he felt himself sink onto the dirty pavement. 

\--------------------------------- 

"Drop the fucking knife!" Blair's voice cut through the silence of the alley. "Drop it now!" Pointing his weapon at the armed man who surged toward his partner, Blair yelled, "Cascade Police! Drop the weapon or I'll shoot!" 

The sound of the cocking pistol echoed off the brick walls. The attacker froze and turned toward Blair, who stood less than five feet away, feet apart, weapon firmly held at shoulder level and pointed directly at the man's head. 

"Do it now!" Blair growled, "or you’re dead meat." His finger flexed minutely. The man took barely a moment to meet Blair's gaze. Silently, he dropped his knife and clenched his fists. "Get on your knees. Put your hands behind your head," Blair ordered. 

When the perp dropped to his knees, Blair quickly moved behind the man. Expertly he slipped the gun into his shoulder holster and pulled out his handcuffs. He snapped the cuffs around one wrist before he yanked the attacker's other arm behind his back. When both wrists were secured, he roughly shoved the man face down onto the pavement. "Move a hair, and I'll put a bullet in your fucking head." 

Blair raced to Jim's side. Jim had fallen to his knees and sat back on his legs with a dazed look on his face. He still had his hand wrapped around his wrist and he held the injured arm tightly against his chest. Blood poured down his arm and dripped from his elbow onto his jeans. 

"Oh, God! Jim." Blair pulled his cell and dialed 911. Giving his location and the proclamation of "officer down", he asked for backup and an ambulance before he disconnected and turned his attention to his partner. 

Jim's surprised gaze was riveted on Blair's face. Touching Jim's shoulder, Blair could feel the tremors coursing through his body. Glancing at the attacker to ascertain that he hadn't moved, Blair gently touched Jim's face. 

"Jim, can you hear me?" 

"Blair?" Jim's voice was hoarse and tinged with pain. He blinked, looking dazed. 

"Yeah. It's me. Let me help." Blair wrapped his hand below Jim's, deciding not to move Jim's hand, which was acting as a temporary tourniquet. From the amount of blood, Blair knew that the wound was very serious. With their combined pressure on the injury, the bleeding seemed to lessen somewhat. With Jim's pain-filled eyes riveted on his face, Blair murmured reassuringly, "Okay You're losing a lot of blood. You're doing a good job keeping pressure on that cut. I know you're in major pain here, so I need you to dial it down. Can you do that? Talk to me. Come on, man, you can do it." 

Jim shivered. "Hurts," he said softly, shaking harder. His eyes fluttered and his head listed. "I... Wha...?" When Jim shook his head several times, Blair could see him desperately trying to keep his focus. 

After another glance at the attacker, who was damned lucky he hadn't moved a muscle, Blair slipped his free arm around Jim's body and tried to share his body warmth and his strength with his trembling partner. He wasn't surprised when Jim immediately sagged against him and the shaking escalated. Blair knew that Jim was going into shock from his shallow breathing, profuse sweating and shivering. 

"Hurry, hurry, hurry," he muttered. "Where are you guys? Come on!" he ordered, urging the ambulance to arrive quickly. Holding his partner close, he spoke reassuringly, "I'm right here, Jim. You're going to be fine. I'll help you. That's it, keep the pressure nice and even. You're doing a great job." 

Hearing the sirens of the police and ambulance grow closer, Blair turned his head toward Prospect. When he saw the emergency equipment screech to a halt at the mouth of the alley and pull equipment from the cabinets on the outside of the vehicle, he yelled, "Down here! Hurry!" Turning back to his partner, he said reassuringly, "Help's here. I love you." Holding his partner close, he silently prayed that Jim would be okay. Biting his lip, his arm tightened when Jim gave a final shudder before slipping into unconsciousness. 

\-------------------------------------------------

Blair watched as Simon Banks strode into the ER waiting room and made a beeline for him. 

"Sandburg?"

Blair rubbed the grit from his eyes. "Oh, hey, Captain."

"Don't 'hey, Captain' me, Detective! How is he?" Simon blustered. 

Blair gave Simon a tired smile. "He's in Recovery right now. Thankfully the operation went smoothly. They repaired all of the muscles and tendons, sutured the artery, of course. The plastic surgeon said he should have minimal scarring. Luckily, they don't think there's any loss of movement in his fingers or hand." 

"Good. Good." Simon clamped a hand on Blair's shoulder. "How you doing?"

"Me? I'm fine. At least I will be after I interrogate the bastard who did this to Jim." 

"Already been done."

"Captain, that was my bust! You should have waited for me! At least you could have told me so I could have been there! Damn it anyway." Blair's eyes narrowed in frustration. 

"I didn't think you'd be up to handling the guy." Simon clamped his lips together tightly. 

Blair looked up into his captain's face, not bothering to hide his irritation. "Thanks a lot, Captain. Almost two years, and you still have no faith in my abilities." Blair turned away, but Simon's strong hand on his shoulder forestalled his retreat

"Sandburg, please. I'm sorry. I just thought... I didn't think, that's the problem. I had no right to step on your toes. I'm sorry," Simon said contritely. 

Blair shoved his hands in his pockets and hung his head for a moment before he looked up to meet his boss's gaze. He straightened his shoulders and held up his head. "Okay. I accept your apology. I'd appreciate seeing a copy of the interrogation report as soon as it's available." 

"Right. Besides, I have something I think you need to see. The investigation is yours, Detective. I won't get in your way unless you need my help." 

"Thanks, sir. As soon as Jim's in his room, and I've seen him, I'll be back at the station. I need to go over that report as soon as possible."

"But don't you think you should go home and sleep? You've been here almost all night. And you need to change clothes."

"When I was on life support after being whacked out on Golden, did Jim go home and sleep? Hell, he was fucking blind and he continued on. When Oliver snatched Jim, did you or Joel sleep? There is no way I'm sleeping while this is unsolved. I want to know why this happened, and I want to know now." Blair met Simon's gaze with determination and conviction. 

Simon held up a hand. "Slow down, Sandburg. I already said the investigation's yours. I'm going home to shower and grab a bite. I'll bring you something to eat and you can have breakfast in my office in, say," glancing at his watch, Simon calculated, "two hours? After you shower and change in the locker room. Deal?" 

"I'll be there. Thank you, Simon. You're a good friend," Blair added with a small smile. 

"Call me if you need anything." Simon gave Blair's shoulder another squeeze before he turned to leave. "Take care of Jim."

"I will," Blair said to Simon's retreating back. "Always," he added softly. Then he went to see if Jim had been moved to his own room yet. 

\-------------------------------------------------

"Sit, Detective, and eat. Coffee?" Simon pushed the brown paper bag toward Blair. 

"Yes, please." Blair tore into the bag. 

"Do you have any idea how hard it is to feed you? Anybody else would have been happy with half a dozen dough nuts, but you have to be conscientious about your body. You're damned fussy." Simon set a large mug of hot coffee next to Blair's elbow. 

"Thanks, Simon," Blair said around the hard-boiled egg he had bitten into. "These are good," he added after eating a second egg and biting into the bagel spread with cream cheese. "I like egg salad, also," Blair added. 

"I'll make a note, Blair," Simon said with a chuckle. "Next time, I'll bring egg salad. How's he doing?"

"Good, thank God. I was able to get him to open his eyes once but he's still really groggy from the meds. Hopefully, by this afternoon, he'll be awake." Pulling an orange from the bag, Blair peeled it quickly. 

"That's good news." Simon pulled a green file folder from a pile on his desk. "This is what I wanted you to see." He pulled an item from the folder. 

Blair nodded, popping an orange segment into his mouth. He swallowed a sip of coffee before wiping his fingers on a napkin. He took the plastic-bagged item from Simon's fingers. "It's Jim and a woman." Blair pulled his glasses from his shirt pocket and after adjusting them; he peered again at the photograph. "It's not a very good picture. Is that Carla Mills?" 

"Yeah."

"And you found this on the guy who attacked Jim?"

"Gregory Mills." 

Blair looked up from his examination of the photograph. "Brother?"

"Husband."

"I know Carla from here at work. She's been at the department for a long time. She and Jim were involved once, but that was years ago. Long before he met me. Before she married Mills and before Jim tied the knot with Carolyn." After staring at the photo for another moment, he asked, "Have you questioned her yet?"

"I'm leaving that to you, Detective." 

"Some old jealousy? Some reason her husband would think Jim would be interested in her again? Why would he have an old picture and attack Jim?" Blair mused. "She here yet?" 

"I spoke with Officer Mills myself. She'll be in within the next few minutes." 

"So how do we play this? I think it might be better if I just talk to her first. Feel her out. See if I get any vibes."

"I don't know. If she's in with her old man, it could turn bad. I'd rather have it on the record."

After running a hand through his hair, Blair nodded. "Then I'll ask her to talk to me on the record. I'd rather not use an interrogation room, if it's okay with you."

"I want video and audio. When Officer Mills reports in, I'll have her escorted to the conference room on three."

"Okay." Blair rose and gathered the remains from his breakfast, tossing it into the nearest trashcan. "Thanks for the food, Simon. It hit the spot. I'm going to visit the men's room, call the hospital, and then I'm going to talk to Mills." Blair gathered up the file folder and dropped the photograph into it. "If she's part of this, I'll find out." 

"Blair, you're taking this really well."

Blair paused, pleased that he was able to keep the aloofness he didn't feel in the least reflected on his face. But for Jim, he could play it cool. "No, I'm not, but I know the drill by now, Simon. No emotions, right?"

Simon nodded. "You're a good cop." 

Pleased at the compliment, he gave Simon a nod. "Thanks. I had a good teacher," he said on his way out. 

\-------------------------------------------------

When the door to the conference room behind him opened, Blair turned away from the window and walked toward the two officers. 

"Good morning, Officer Mills," Blair said to the uniformed woman. To the second officer, he added, "Thanks, Officer George. Talk to you later." 

The man nodded and left, closing the door behind him. 

"Have a seat," Blair offered, pulling a chair away from the table. 

"Thanks," Mills said, perching on the very edge of the chair. She cupped her hands around her knees and to Blair, it looked like she was trying not to fidget. 

Blair closely examined Mills' body language. Although she tried to hide it, her nervousness and unhappiness radiated from every pore. "Coffee?" Blair asked politely. 

Crossing her arms tightly over her chest, she nodded. "Please. Cream and sugar. Lots of sugar." 

Mills' gaze darted around the room and when she saw the video camera mounted on the wall opposite the table, Blair saw her quickly look away, irritation on her face. Setting the coffee down in front of Mills, he said, "I'd like to talk to you about your husband, Gregory." 

"This is being recorded," Mills stated. 

"Yes," Blair said. "Does that bother you?"

"No. I guess not." Looking at Blair, her lips made a thin, tight line. "Should it?"

"Nope. Just asking." 

Blair poured himself a cup of coffee and after setting it down on the table, he sat, slipped on his glasses, and opened the file folder that he had placed on the table earlier. He took a sip of coffee while he leafed through the papers, quickly re-reading the arrest report from last evening. 

"So, Officer Mills, I'm sure Captain Banks informed you that your husband has been arrested for aggravated assault and attempted murder."

"Greg has a hot head but he's not a murderer." 

"He's been arrested on two prior charges of assault. He plea-bargained out on probation on those charges because he didn't use a weapon. I see that he's been detained on three incidents of domestic violence." Blair intently scanned another paper in the file. "Why didn't you press charges?" 

Mills' face turned white. "That's personal, Detective."

"It's a matter of record, Officer," Blair said, not unkindly. "You're a police officer. You know that somebody who hurts another person needs to be punished."

"You've never been married, have you, Detective?" 

Shrugging, Blair smiled. "You've known me for what, six years? Call me Blair." He waited, wondering if she would extend the same friendly courtesy. When she merely waited for him to continue, he made a mental note that while Mills was being polite, Blair got the distinct feeling that she disliked him on a more personal than professional level. Interesting. After a few moment, he continued. "How close were you and James Ellison?"

"What? Why are you asking me that? Has something happened to Jim?" Mills' hand shook when she reached out for her coffee cup.

Their gazes met. She abruptly pulled back her hand and held it with her other one. Blair made another mental note: she knew that Blair knew she was nervous. What was she hiding? 

"Tell me about you and Jim." Blair spoke calmly and did everything he could to radiate an aura of trust to the woman, whom he could see was growing more upset by the minute. "Please." He glanced up and saw the red blinking light of the video camera. Sitting forward and resting on his elbows on his knees, he said, "Were you and Jim close?"

Mills nodded. "For a while, long ago, but now...." She shrugged. "Not very close. It was before Carolyn Plummer. I thought..." 

"You thought what?" he prompted gently. 

"That we had something going. Then she moved in, and he wasn't interested any more." Mills practically spat out the word, her distaste at Plummer evident. 

"That must have been rough."

Feigning nonchalance, Mills shrugged. "You win some. You lose some." 

"That's very mature of you. Then they divorced." 

"When they split up, I thought I might have another chance. We went out a few times after the divorce. Had a good time, I thought. I understand what being a cop's wife is all about. Plummer didn't. After all, she wasn't on the street like I was." 

"Yeah, it helps to have an understanding partner. So then what happened?"

"Happened?" 

"Yes. Between you and Jim." 

"Nothing happened. Jim and I have had lunch off and on over the years." Mills fiddled with the coffee cup, spilling several drops on the smooth wooden table. "In fact, Jim took me to lunch about three months ago. We had a good time. He was very nice to me."

"Jim thinks of you as a friend. He treats his friends well." Blair resisted the urge to fidget. Everything screamed to him that she had something to do with Jim's attack, and her innocent, wide-eyed demeanor was starting to bother him. "So where did Greg find this?" Blair slid the photograph of Mills and Jim across the desk.

Leaning forward, Mills looked intently at the snapshot. "Oh, that old thing. I thought I'd thrown that away." Sitting up, she said, "That was taken at the annual policemen's picnic almost eight years ago. I don't know where Greg found that." Running her finger through the coffee spill on the table, Carla asked, "Has something happened to Jim?"

Wishing he had his Sentinel's ability to listen to the woman's heart rate and respiration, Blair relied on his own people instincts. Watching Mills' face closely, he said, "Yes. He was attacked last night. He's going to be okay, though, but he had to have emergency surgery."

While her face showed her unhappiness at the news, she didn't seem surprised. "Oh, my God! That's awful. I need to go and visit him. I'll stop by on my way home. The poor guy!" 

*Yeah, right. Real concern,* Blair thought sarcastically, but he said, "Ah, I don't think that would be such a good idea today. He's really out of it, but I'll tell him you asked about him."

When Carla's eyes narrowed quickly, Blair realized that she did, indeed, know about his relationship with Jim. Giving Blair what looked like a false smile, she said, "Okay, thanks. But you'll let me know when he's up for visitors? I'll bring him some of those buttermilk dough nuts he likes so much. Are we finished?"

"Yeah, go ahead. I'll talk to you later." 

"Tell Jim I'm sorry he's hurt, and I'll see him soon."

Blair sat back in his chair and watched the woman's face while she rose. She was lying through her teeth. "Sure. Will do. Why don't you go home and get some rest?"

Nodding, Mills quickly left, leaving Blair to fiddle with the photograph and to think about his next step. 

\-------------------------------------------------

"Mr. Mills, I'm Detective Blair Sandburg." Blair carried a cold can of soda into the interrogation room and set it down in front of the man sitting at the table. "I brought you something to drink."

"Why?" Mills growled. 

"Why what? Why are you here or why did I bring you something to drink?"

"I know why I'm here, asshole." 

"Okay, then, let's get down to business." Blair pulled the much-displayed photograph from the folder he carried. "Tell me about this." Blair planted the picture on the table in front of Mills. 

"What's to tell? My old lady was fucking around on me. I handled it." Mills seemed quite pleased with himself. 

"So your wife and Detective Ellison are what exactly?"

"Is there something in the word 'fucking' that you don't understand?" Mills said smartly. "Seems pretty clear from my end." 

"Where did you find the picture?"

Sighing, Mills popped open the soda can. "In my wife's underwear drawer."

"And how did that make you feel?"

"What are you, a fucking psychiatrist? It made me feel like shit, you prick!" 

Blair ignored the man's belligerent attitude and kept his tone even. "So you're admitting to attacking Detective Ellison?" 

Mills rolled his eyes. "You aren't one of the smart ones, are you? I "confessed" hours ago." Mills made the quotation marks in the air with thick fingers. "Aren't you the dick head who arrested me? Man, you're really not too smart," he repeated. 

"No, not too. Hey, I was just wondering," Blair mused out loud, "when this picture was taken?" 

"Carla said it was from last month, the stupid bitch. I had to use all of my ah, charms before she finally admitted that her and that bastard were at it again." 

Blair swallowed hard, forcing himself to remain aloof from Mills' arrogance and idiocy. The feral grin Mills gave Blair when he said "charms" made his stomach churn. His Guide instincts to protect his Sentinel made him wish he could pound the man into a bloody pulp, but he remained in control, surprised that he was able to carry on the questioning with such a 'detached' feeling. 

"So let me get this straight. Your wife and Detective Ellison were having an affair as recently as last week?"

"Yeah. That's what I said. Clean your ears out, Detective." He said Blair's title derisively. 

"Did you slash the tires on Detective Ellison's truck?"

To Blair, Mills looked genuinely confused when he said, "What? Hell no! Don't pin any shit on me that I didn't do. I'm not some stupid kid going around slashing tires." 

"What about Detective Ellison's apartment? Are you responsible for the vandalism?"

Starting to rise, Mills growled, "Hey, what is this? Some big set up? I'm not going down for any crap that I didn't do!" 

"Sit down." When Mills seemed to balk, Blair gave him an ingratiating smile. "Please. Nobody wants you to do time for something you didn't do, least of all me."

Mill's glared at Blair for a moment, before he nodded. "Okay." Mills sat. For a few minutes, he played with the half-empty soda can before he muttered, "I had the right to defend what's mine, but I didn't fuck around with that bastard's stuff." 

"Okay. I believe you," Blair said honestly. "Thanks for your cooperation." 

"You going to talk to the DA for me like you said?"

"I'll explain that you cooperated." 

"Gee, thanks. That sounds real sincere." Mills rolled his eyes. 

Blair rose. "I said I'd talk to him and I will. I don't go back on my word."

Eying Blair carefully, Mills finally nodded, seeming to accept Blair's sincerity. "Yeah, right. Thanks."

Blair gave Mills a tired look before he left. Leaning against the wall outside the interrogation room, he rubbed his eyes with his hands and sighed. 

"Good work, Sandburg." Walking down the hall toward Blair, Simon clamped the cigar between his teeth. 

"Thanks, Captain. You heard?"

"Yes, Detective, I heard. So you think Officer Mills used her old man to do her dirty work?"

Blair picked at a fingernail. "Yeah. I think she did the vandalism herself, but she wanted something more. I noticed when I was talking to her that she had on a lot of make-up. I think Mills smacked her around and she finally got fed up with it."

Simon chewed his cigar thoughtfully. "What's the payoff? Get her husband sent to jail?"

"It could be that she was out for revenge against both her husband and Jim. This way she kills two birds with one stone. See, I figure what she thought was that if Mills hurt or killed Jim, he would go to prison for a long time. She's rid of him. If Jim had been able to defend himself and took Mills down, the husband still either goes to prison or Jim kills him in self-defense." Blair looked thoughtful for a moment before he added, "If Mills killed Jim in the alley, there was always the possibility that I'd catch him, like I did. If Mills resisted, I'd shoot him. He's dead or in jail either way. She gets rid of the husband. Don't forget, she also gets even with Jim for not wanting her as a wife or lover."

"Blair?" Simon's gaze held Blair's. 

"What?"

"Would you have shot Mills if he had been successful?" 

"That's hypothetical, Captain. What do you want me to say?" Blair pushed himself away from the wall and looked intently at his boss. Very quietly, Blair said, "Hypothetically, Captain, I'd have blown his fucking head off." He turned and walked away, leaving Simon with his mouth hanging open in surprise, he was sure. He didn't bother looking back. 

\-------------------------------------------------

The first thing Blair noticed when he walked into Jim's hospital room was the beautiful bouquet of fresh purple hyacinths. He stared at the flowers for a few moments before he pulled the card out, even though he already knew who had sent them. Naomi, of course. Only she would send a flower that delivered a specific message. Blair remembered her many little talks about flowers and their meanings from when he was about ten and Naomi had worked one summer arranging flowers in a friend's green house. Purple hyacinths meant 'please forgive me'. Seeing his mother's name scrawled across the card made Blair close his eyes and hold his breath for a moment. He crumpled the card in his fist before Jim's voice broke his reverie. 

"Chief?" Jim whispered sleepily. 

"Jim!" Blair quickly moved to his lover's side. Carefully hitching a hip onto the side of the bed, he smiled warmly. "How are you feeling?" 

"Tired."

"I'll bet." Blair looked Jim over carefully. His hair was mussed and stood in little peaks from rubbing against the pillow. His face was pale and his eyes were clouded with the painkiller that his doctor was carefully administering. His lips were dry and he licked them several times. 

"Here's some water," Blair said, filling a glass and slipping in a straw. He held the glass and put the straw to Jim's lips. Jim drank the entire glass. "You want more?"

"No, that's good. Thanks." Jim closed his eyes and sighed. "What happened?"

Blair examined Jim's injured arm that rested on a pillow. It was wrapped in gauze from his knuckles to a couple of inches above his elbow. 

"You don't remember?"

"It's kind of fuzzy. My arm hurts," Jim said tiredly. 

"I know, my love," Blair said softly, rubbing Jim's uninjured arm. "You're going to be okay." 

"Blair?" Jim opened his eyes. He looked around and seemed confused for a moment. 

Putting a hand on the side of Jim's face, Blair smiled. "Hey, I'm right here. Want me to hold your hand?"

Jim tried to smile. "Yeah. That'd be nice." 

Jim managed to raise his uninjured hand up from the bed. Blair slipped his own hand under his. He wrapped his other hand around Jim's fingers, carefully avoiding the IV needle that was securely taped into the back of Jim's hand. 

"Can you feel me holding your hand?" Blair asked. 

Jim's forehead furrowed. "I feel really funny." He considered for another moment before he said, "I can feel you holding my hand. Weird. I had to actually think about it." Sighing, Jim's eyes closed. 

"You still have some of the anesthetic from surgery in your system. You'll be thinking more clearly when it wears off. Plus the doctor's giving you a mild painkiller, but you'll be fine. I'll take care of you."

"Okay," Jim said trustingly. "Blair?"

"Yeah?" Moving one of his hands to Jim's head, Blair petted the soft brown hair lightly before running the backs of his fingers down the side of Jim's face, making Jim sigh again and lean into his lover's touch. "What is it? Do you need anything?"

"Only you." Jim's words were a bit slurred as he drifted into sleep, but Blair understood. 

"Love you, Jim." Blair leaned over and kissed his lover's forehead. Very gently, he moved his hand and settled Jim's on the bed with care. Pulling a chair close to the bed, he sat down, crossed his arms, put his head down on them and fell asleep also. 

\-------------------------------------------------

A hand on Blair's shoulder woke him several hours later. 

"Detective?" 

Blair blinked sleepily and sat up, rubbing his eyes. "Yeah?" he asked, looking up at the nurse. 

"You have a phone call at the nurses' station. It's your captain." She gave Blair a warm smile. "I know you're worried but he's doing well," she said, nodding toward Jim. "Dr. Roberts will be in shortly to check on him. He's making his rounds now."

"Okay. Thanks." Blair rose and stretched. He gave his lover the once-over and was pleased that Jim's color was a little better. He'd be a lot happier when Jim was fully awake and out of pain, but for now, he was happy with his partner's condition. He touched Jim's arm lightly before heading out to answer the telephone. 

"Hi, Simon." 

"Sandburg. We have enough from Greg Mills to officially bring in Carla Mills. Do you want to run the interrogation?"

"Yeah, I think I should. If she's out to get Jim, she might open up for me."

"Why's that? You're the competition, so to speak. You know she must know about you and Jim."

"I realize that, but you've heard the old adage about a woman scorned? I think she'd like to brag and maybe stick in the knife and twist it around. Metaphorically, you know." Blair rubbed the sleep sand out of one eye and then unsuccessfully tried to smooth his unruly hair. 

"Can you be here in an hour?"

"Yes. I'll tell Jim I'm leaving and see you in an hour."

"How's he doing this morning?"

"He's still asleep but at least he's not restless. I think he'll be okay but he's got some recovery time to put in."

"Tell him I said to get his ass out of bed and back to work."

Blair chuckled softly. "Okay, Simon. I'll tell him. Bye."

"Take it easy," Simon said before disconnecting. 

"Will do," Blair said, hanging up the receiver. Making a quick visit to the men's room, he used the toilet and splashed cold water on his face. Peering into the mirror, he yanked the elastic band from his disheveled hair, raked his fingers through his curls and tugged, replacing the band on the remade ponytail. "It will have to do for now," he muttered to himself, then returned to Jim's room. 

Blair climbed on the edge of the bed and waited patiently for his waking partner to open his eyes. Jim blinked several times before he focused on his surroundings. Blair smiled at him. 

"Morning, my love," Blair said softly. "How do you feel?" 

"Hey, Chief. I'm okay." 

"How's the arm?"

Jim peered down at his bandaged arm. He flexed his fingers, letting out an audible sigh. "It still works." The relief in his voice was evident. 

"Good," Blair said with a grin. "How are your senses? Anything acting up?"

Jim considered for a moment before he said, "Everything seems to be okay. I'm thirsty as hell, but otherwise, nothing's bothering me."

"Oh, great, man. Just great. You want some juice?" 

"That'd be good. Thanks." Jim reached out to touch Blair's cheek. "I remember what happened." 

"Let me get you something to drink first. Then we'll talk."

Jim nodded. Blair slid from the bed and disappeared into the hallway, returning a few minutes later with two plastic containers of orange juice. 

"You're lucky. The breakfast trays are being passed out. I snatched these."

Jim raised an eyebrow. "Stealing?"

Blair laughed. He hit the bed control, raising it to a reclining position. "Of course not! I asked first." Peeling the plastic cap from the container, Blair put a straw in it and held it for his lover. While Jim drank, Blair said, "I'm so happy you're going to be okay. Man, you scared the shit out of me."

Draining the small bottle, Jim licked his lips. "That tasted good. May I have the other one?"

"Sure. For you, anything."

Jim smiled. Blair saw that his hand seemed steady so he put the juice container into it. He was please to see the contents disappeared in short order. 

"You were thirsty," Blair noted. 

"I'm okay now. Thanks to you." Jim handed the empty bottle to Blair. When Blair set it down on the small table, Jim's fingers found Blair's shirtsleeve. He tugged gently. "Come here."

Blair smiled and slid closer. With a hand on Jim's shoulder, he leaned down and kissed his lover tenderly on the forehead. "God, Jim. Please don't scare me like that again!" 

Jim was serious when he said, "I was scared, too. I thought that it was 'the end'. Really thought I'd finally bought it. Thank you." 

"Hey. It's okay. That's what partners are for. Right?"

"Yeah, right. I'm still not sure exactly why it happened," Jim mused. "Random mugging?" 

"No. The guy who attacked you was Gregory Mills, Carla Mills' husband." Blair fiddled with a button on his shirt before he added, "She might be involved, Jim." 

Jim's eyes clouded over. "Carla? From street patrol? But she's a friend. At least I thought she was. You think she had something to do with me being hurt?" 

"Geez, Jim. I'm really sorry, but yes, I think she set you up. She set up her husband too, I'm sure of it. I have to go down to the station in a bit and question her. The husband's given enough information so that Simon's decided to bring her in. I've already talked to her, and she gave me bad vibes the whole time."

"Bad vibes?"

"Hey. I don’t have those Sentinel senses to tell if she was lying so I had to rely on my intuition."

"A good cop always uses his intuition. You are a good cop."

"Thanks," Blair said shyly. "Anyway, I have to go for a while but I'll be back later. I'll bring you something good to eat."

"And don't forget to take a shower."

"What? Are you insinuating that I smell ripe?" 

"No, I'm not insinuating. I'm telling you straight out. You need a shower."

Laughing, Blair slid from the bed. He leaned over and wrapped his arms around Jim's neck, kissing the side of his face and his ear lightly. "I love you so much!" he said fiercely, squeezing very gently. 

Jim reached up with his good hand and wrapped his fingers around Blair's upper arm. "Love you too. You know that, don't you?" 

When their eyes met, Blair nodded. "I know, but I love hearing you say it." Blair licked his lips. "You going to be okay, about Mills and all? I know it hurts to think that somebody you care about might have done something to hurt you." 

Jim sighed. "It seems like the story of my life, but I'll be okay. I know I can count on you. You'll handle it, right?"

Jim was hurting, both mentally and physically. Jim needed him. Giving his partner a tender smile, he nodded. "Sure. I'll handle it. Always. I'll always be here for you. You know that, don't you?" 

Seriously, Jim nodded. "I know." 

"Good." 

"Say, Chief, nice flowers. You bring them?" 

Blair's face fell. He straightened up, cleared his throat and quickly schooled his features back into a pleasant demeanor, but not before Jim must have sensed something from him. 

"Blair?" Jim asked softly. "What is it?"

"The flowers aren't from me. They're from my mother." 

"Oh. You haven't talked to her, have you?"

"No, and I don't plan on it either." Blair paced while his hands flew through the air, punctuating his words. "It's all her fault you're hurt! How many times does she have to hurt you before you realize that it's best if she's out of our lives?" 

"Is that how you really feel? She's your mom. I wish I had a mother. Besides, when she e-mailed your dissertation..." 

Blair stopped his pacing to glare at his lover. "That is so not fair! Guilting me into talking to her isn't fair at all! I shouldn't have to feel guilty about my own mother." Blair tugged at a stray lock of hair. "What am I going to do?" he asked wistfully. "I mean, she's my mom, but she has to stop interfering! I'm a grown man, damn it!"

"You're preaching to the choir here, buddy. Talk to her. You're good with words. Make her understand. Explain it in that great way of yours. Use the old Guide voice and charm the hell out of her, tell her what you need from her." 

"For heaven's sake, since when did you get so damned philosophical?"

Jim shrugged, yawning. "I love you. I want you to be happy. You're not happy being on the outs with Naomi. So fix it. Please, for your own peace of mind."

Blair shook his head in a mixture of exasperation and affection. "Okay, okay. You win. Besides, it's good advice. Man, I love you. Rest. I'll be back before you know it." Jim chuckled when Blair leaned over and planted a good-bye kiss to the end of his nose. Jim was still smiling when he waved goodbye from the doorway. Blair left knowing that the confrontation with his mother would have to wait until the case was wrapped up. Then he would deal with Naomi. 

\-------------------------------------------------

Blair entered the interrogation room and nodded at Carla Mills. The woman glared at him. Knowing this wasn't going to be pleasant, he took the seat opposite her. 

"Hello, Officer. You've been apprised of your rights? Everything's been done by the book?"

Mills lifted her chin. "Yes, but I still don't understand why I've been detained. I didn't do anything!" 

"Why don't you tell me about what happened within the last few weeks between you and your husband?" 

"There's nothing to tell," Mills said coldly. "Whatever he said isn't true."

"And what do you think he said?"

Shrugging, Mills picked at a fingernail. "I'm sure he's told you he's Mr. Innocent and that I'm the wicked witch of the west."

Blair examined her face closely. "You still have some bruising under your right eye."

"What?"

"He hit you, didn't he?"

Mills shook her head. "I'm a police officer. Nobody hits me."

"It's not something to be ashamed of, Officer. We can get you help. There are plenty of women's organizations-"

"No. I can handle my own life. Thanks." 

When Blair's gaze met hers, she quickly looked away. Blair carefully studied her face and body language. He framed his next questions carefully. "Did you leave the picture of you and Jim Ellison where your husband could find it? You knew he'd blow a gasket, didn't you? You knew he'd go after Jim."

"What? No." Mills shook her head vehemently. "I'd never hurt Jim. I like Jim." 

"I think you were upset when you found out that Jim was involved with someone else. After your lunch a couple of months ago, you thought that he might be interested in you in a more than casual way. More than a friendly acquaintance."

"No. I never. I had no idea Greg would go after Jim." Mills avoided meeting Blair's gaze. 

"Did you hope that Greg would kill Jim?"

"No! I just wanted..." Mills paused. 

When she didn't continue, Blair prompted, "Just wanted what? Tell me. You've sworn to uphold the law. You took an oath." 

Mills glared. "It's not like that at all! I didn't want Jim hurt! Why can't you understand that?"

"What is it then? You thought that Jim could protect himself so you figured he would get rid of your husband for you. Is that what you hoped for? That way, Greg would go to jail, and Jim would feel badly about putting your husband away. Maybe you hoped he'd break it off with whomever he was currently involved and look to comfort you. It's a reasonable thought." 

Mills' eyes narrowed. "Don't try to be nice to me, Detective. I know about you and Jim."

"Oh. Yeah, I figured you did. Does that make you upset? Knowing that Jim is unavailable."

"Nobody said he's unavailable. Jim tends to have lots of friends. He's dated a lot of women, but none of them were serious. I know. I've paid attention." Mills gave Blair a dismissive look. "Besides, you're not what he needs." 

"What does he need?" Blair asked, a bit angry with himself for asking the question, but needing, wanting to hear what an outsider thought of their relationship. 

"He needs a strong partner, not some reject from the university." Mills pressed her hands flat on the table and leaned forward, her voice was suddenly low and venomous "You only got into the academy because you kissed a lot of ass. You must have fucked Banks to get him to go to bat for you. There is nothing about you that makes you a decent cop or a good partner." 

Blair refused to be baited into an argument. Instead, he sighed and leaned back in his chair, silently scrutinizing the woman. After a few moments, he said, "I can get you a deal, Officer Mills. If you confess to conspiracy in the aggravated assault, the most you'll have to serve is three years. Probably less, with your background as a police officer, and if you agree to testify against Gregory. I'll explain to the DA about the spousal abuse if you like. But if you don't cooperate and you're tried for accessory in the attempted murder of a police officer, you'll do ten to fifteen years."

Mills' face paled. "I didn't do anything!" 

"Okay, have it your way. At least I tried." Blair started to rise. 

Mills let out a muffled sob. "Listen. All I did was mess up his place a bit. Flatten a couple of tires. I didn't hurt Jim!"

Blair sat back down. "Oh?"

Tears formed in Mills' eyes. "I didn't mean for Jim to get hurt! You have to believe me! Yeah, I left the picture for Greg to find. I figured he'd confront Jim. I thought Jim would be okay! I didn't want him to get hurt! I didn't think Greg had the balls to use a weapon. With me, his fists were his weapons." Mills wiped her eyes. "I don't want to go to prison. I couldn't take being locked up." 

"So you want me to talk to the DA? You'll sign a confession about the vandalism? You'll testify against Greg?" 

"Yes," she said tearfully. "I didn't want Jim to be hurt," she repeated. 

Blair rose. "I know you didn't." His shoulders slumped; he was so tired! "Write it down." He pushed a yellow tablet and pen before her. "Everything. You know the drill, then sign it. I'll send in somebody who'll take you to processing."

Slouching in the chair, Mills nodded. 

Blair ran a hand down his face and left the room with his fists clenched. He was very angry that the woman had been responsible for his partner's pain and suffering but he reined in his emotions and buried his protective instincts as Jim's Guide deep inside. He was a cop; he didn't exact revenge, he helped mete justice. At least he hoped he did. 

\-------------------------------------------------

A soft knock at his door had Jim turn up his hearing slightly. Blair didn't usually knock. The nurses and doctors barged in whenever they needed to. Simon would have blustered in and demanded that Jim recover quickly. Besides, Jim smelled the telltale fragrance of sage. 

"Come on in, Naomi," Jim called. 

The red hair appeared first, then the pale face. "Hello, Jim. You sure you don't mind?"

Jim waved. "You're here." 

"Oh, okay." Naomi slipped through the partially opened door and walked across the room with a tentative smile on her face. "This is for you." She held out a nicely wrapped box. 

Jim nodded, smelling the expensive chocolate. "Thanks." When Naomi set the box down, he said, "Have a seat."

"No, thanks." Naomi paced, wringing her hands. "I wanted to apologize. I'm really sorry that you're hurt. I feel like it was my fault somehow."

Jim examined Naomi's face. He sensed the sincerity in her words. "I appreciate the sentiment, Naomi, and I understand you feel badly about what happened. I'm still not exactly sure why I was attacked. Blair's still investigating-"

Naomi stopped and turned wide eyes on Jim. "Blair's investigating? He's on the street alone?"

"Yeah. He didn't have much of a choice with me laid up."

"God, it's too dangerous for him out there alone! You can't let him be out on the streets without you!"

"It's not like I have a choice. Apparently, you still don't understand that Blair's decision to become a cop was one that he made for himself."

Naomi turned her face away. "You practically forced him into the Academy. After he was dismissed from Rainier, he didn't have any other choice. Blair would feel like he was a failure if he didn't have a job a career. He's always been too conscientious that way, and he's always been very independent even as a boy."

"I don't know where you get your information, but apparently, you and Blair haven't talked much about what happened after the dissertation was exposed. You didn't know that Blair's lawyer got him reinstated to the university? That they were willing to accept him back into the PhD. program? They were even willing to hire him on a permanent basis to teach after they found out about Sid Graham and his unethical practices." Jim looked directly at Naomi when he said, "Blair made the decision to attend the academy. He's a grown man. I don't make life-altering decisions for him; he makes them for himself. I think that's something you still can't or won't understand." 

Naomi's face fell. "I didn't know," she admitted. "He never told me."

Jim sighed, tired of dealing with Naomi already. "Maybe it's because you don't listen when he talks to you."

"But I love Blair with all my heart!"

"I never disputed your love for him. I'm just pointing out that maybe your love blinds you somewhat to his wants. To how he feels and what he needs." 

Naomi tipped her chin defiantly. "You don't have any right to tell me what he needs."

Jim rolled his eyes. "You won't listen to me either. You only hear what you want to hear. I'm really tired. Thanks for coming by." Jim closed his eyes. 

Naomi fidgeted for a few moments. "Jim?"

"What?" he answered tiredly. 

"You do love him?" she asked haltingly. 

Opening his eyes, Jim gave her what he hoped was his sincerest look. "With all my heart," he confessed, not the least bit embarrassed to have his lover's mother know that he was sexually intimate with her son. "And I always will." Jim paused before he added, "But I'm not Blair's mother. You hold a special place in his heart and if you don't fix this, he'll suffer for it. Is that what you want?" 

"No! Of course not." Naomi played with her earring. "You're right. You're absolutely right. I'll fix this. I promise." 

"Good. Thank you. For me and for Blair." 

"You're a good man." 

Now it was Jim's turn to bristle. He was too tired to become really angry, but the words tumbled out nonetheless. "You say that with your opinion of the police and military?" Naomi had the good grace to blush. Jim continued. "I don't understand why you think it's okay to disparage me or my profession. What in the hell do you think I'm doing out there every day?" Jim's voice was quiet but there was no mistaking the icy tone he used. "You think I'm hurting people. What?" He again let out a tired sigh. "If you were raped and beaten, wouldn't you want me, a cop, to find the guy who did it to you? If one of your friend's kids were kidnapped, who would you call to help? Some psychic? Grow up, Naomi." 

Naomi put a hand on Jim's arm. She ignored the tears wetting her cheeks and said, "You're right. That was a mean and cruel thing to do. I don't know why I have to play the flower-child peace and love game sometimes other than it's familiar. It gives me a shield to hide behind." Wiping her eyes, she sniffled. "I'm sorry for ever calling you a pig. Please accept my apology."

"I do accept it on one condition."

"Which is?"

"Please have the courtesy not to refer to any of us as that , again."

"I promise. Thank you. Blair is lucky to have you for a friend." She gave Jim a weak smile. 

"Speaking of Blair..." Jim looked toward the door. 

"What? He's here?" Naomi blushed, obviously suddenly remembering Jim's abilities. "Oh, God. I didn't ask if it was okay with him to visit you. He's going to be angry."

"Blair isn't a child. He won't be angry because you visited me. He'll think you cared enough to at least make an effort."

Naomi gave Jim a shaky smile. "You and he are close," she said unnecessarily. 

Jim's eyes focused on the door and when his lover's curly head poked in, Jim grinned. "Hey, Chief."

\-----------------------------

With a bright smile, Blair said, "Hi, Jim. How- Oh, hey, mom." His face quickly turned guarded when he realized Jim had company. Seeing his mother, he stood stiffly, holding a take-out bag in one hand and a six-pack of bottled spring water in the other. 

Naomi crossed to the door, straightening her sweater. "I'll go and leave you two to visit. I've overstayed my welcome." 

Jim remained silent. Blair glanced at him then back to his mother, fidgeting for a moment, shoving the six-pack under the arm that held the bag. He tugged on the end of a short strand of hair. "You didn't upset Jim, did you, Naomi?"

"No, of course not! I came by to see how he's doing. I feel responsible so I wanted to be sure he was recovering." Naomi took another step toward the door. 

Blair nodded. "Oh, okay. Well, I guess I'll see you around." Blair stepped away from the door, giving Naomi an exit. 

Stopping in front of her son, Naomi said, "Jim and I had a very good discussion, Blair. I'd like the chance to talk with you. I have some important things to say and some matters that need clearing up." 

Blair shrugged, uncomfortable. Naomi was his mother and when face-to-face, his warring emotions couldn't decide whether to be angry or just plain sad over her behavior. His love for her and his need for her approval made him a little unsure and unsettled. "Sure. Okay. Whenever."

"Blair, sweetie? Do you want to go somewhere and have a cup of coffee so we can talk?"

"Ah, yeah. Okay, I guess. Give me a minute with Jim." 

Naomi nodded and smiled. "I'll wait outside." 

Blair waited until Naomi left before he crossed to Jim's side. "Hey, man. You're looking a lot better." He set the bag and bottles down on the nightstand. 

Jim gave him a warm smile. "I'm feeling a lot better now that you're here."

Blair grinned. "You're being awfully calm about her." Blair thrust a thumb in Naomi's direction. "Did she bother you?" he asked quietly, studying his shoes intently. 

Jim smiled softly. "Chief, she didn't bother me. You need to talk to her."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Blair sighed before he finally raised his head to look into his partner's face. "How's the arm?"

"After the doctor had the bandages changed, he put me in this sling and has it fastened down pretty securely. They don't want me banging the arm around."

"You'd better behave yourself then."

"I always behave," Jim said. 

"Yeah, right. You are such a liar. Good news, though. You're sprung from this joint tomorrow morning."

"Good. I hate hospitals."

"No shit. Hey, you hungry?"

Jim grinned. "Yeah. But first..." Jim gave Blair a shy smile. 

"First?"

"Give me a kiss, you dork." 

"Dork? You call me names and you want a kiss? Man, you do not know how to get what you want. Not with that attitude." Blair crossed his arms and pretended to glare. 

Jim pushed out his lower lip and gave Blair his most solemn, blue-eyed plea, making Blair burst out laughing. 

"Oh, man. I'm so glad you're going to be okay," Blair said softly, moving closer and sliding a hip onto the bed. He put his hands on Jim's face and brought their lips together for a gentle kiss. Pulling back, Blair whispered, "I love you." 

Jim's bright eyes met Blair's. "Love you too, Romeo." After another quick kiss, he asked, "What smells so good? I'm starving."

"I'm not surprised. The food in this place isn't the best." Jumping from the bed, Blair opened the sack and set the white take-out container on the wheeled table and rolled it so that Jim could easily reach it. "I brought you a nice light pasta with Alfredo sauce and veggies from Leoni's. I had Alphonse make it with all fresh ingredients. It should be easy on your stomach." 

Jim grinned. "I'm famished."

"That means you're feeling better. I'm surprised you're doing so well so quickly." Handing Jim a spoon, Blair said, "Eat up before it gets cold. I had Alphonse use those little pasta wheels you like so you can use a spoon. I figured you'd make a mess with fettuccine noodles."

Chuckling, Jim took the spoon Blair offered and dove into the food. He ate a few bites before he said, "This is great. Thanks." 

Blair set one of the small bottles of water on Jim's table, along with another, smaller take-out container. "Fresh spring water and a half order of tiramisu." 

Jim's eyes radiated love and pleasure. "Thanks," he mumbled around another mouthful. "Now get out of here. Go." He pointed the spoon at the door. "I'll be here when you get back." 

Blair sighed. "Yeah, I know. I'm just not sure..."

"You'll be fine. Just tell her what you want her to hear. You're a grown man. She still sees a little boy. But you can handle it. I have confidence in you."

"Man, you are too forgiving about all of this."

Jim put down the spoon and said seriously, "Listen to me. In case you've forgotten, I was directly responsible for you being killed. Don't even try to defend it, Blair. You know it was my fault Alex hurt you. But you forgave me. We've become something I never dreamed would happen. We're a couple. We're together. If you have the heart to understand and forgive me, I know you have it in that big heart of yours to work things out with Naomi."

Blair rolled his eyes. "You sure know which buttons to push, don't you?"

Jim laughed. "Yeah, I guess I do." He waggled an eyebrow. 

Blair swatted Jim's good arm lightly. "Not those buttons, smart mouth." 

"Those are nice buttons. Can't wait to get my hands on them again." Jim's eyes danced merrily. He picked his spoon back up and waved it toward the door. 

Blair nodded, suddenly serious. "Me, either. I can't wait." He leaned over and kissed Jim's lips lightly, tasting cream and herbs with a trace of broccoli. After licking his lips, he said, "Be back in a while to read you a bedtime story."

Jim smiled. "I'll be waiting with bells on." 

Smiling, Blair went to join his mother. 

\-------------------------------------------------

"I'll have the chai tea," Blair said to the service person behind the counter at the coffee shop. 

"I'll have the same," Naomi said. "Do you want something to eat? My treat?"

"No, I'm not hungry."

"You look a little thin, Blair. Are you sure?"

"Mom, please," Blair answered firmly. "I think I know if I'm hungry or not." He turned and leaned against the counter, crossing his arms. 

"I'm sorry. Blair, I'm sorry. I don't know what gets into me lately. I'm all "motherly" and it's driving me crazy. I'm sure it's hormones." 

Sliding a five-dollar bill across the counter, Blair accepted the paper cup from his mother's hand. "I'm paying anyway. It's the gentleman's place, if I remember my manners correctly."

Naomi smiled. "Thank you, sweetie." She led the way to a small, corner table and slid into a chair. 

Blair set his cup down, shrugged out of his coat and sat. Sipping the delicious brew, he savored the flavor for a few moments. Now that he was sitting down, the Lack of sleep and emotional drain from the last few days was starting to take its toll. The warm tea settling into his stomach made him feel sleepy. He rubbed his eyes and shook his head. Naomi had been speaking, and he hadn't heard a single word. 

"Naomi, Mom, I'm sorry. I was drifting. What did you say?" 

"You look tired." 

"I am tired." 

"We can do this another time. Why don't you go home and sleep?"

"Mom, I'm here. You're here. This needs to be settled. If it can be, that is."

"Blair, anything can be resolved with a calm and rational discussion."

"More sweetness and light?" Blair asked testily.

Naomi's face fell, making Blair feel sorry for being so flippant. "Sorry, Mom. Really, I am, I just feel it's a waste of time! I've talked to you until I'm blue in the face. After you sent my paper to Sid Graham, I specifically asked you not to do anything else. You promised! It's just semantics that you'd already done something incredibly stupid and didn't bother to warn me. The fact is that you didn't even try to tell me! I had to be blindsided with a camera and microphone in my face. Do you have any idea how that made me feel?"

"I thought I was doing what was best for you." 

"I don't want you doing what you think is best for me! I want you to do as I ask. If I fuck, sorry, mess up, it's my own fault. Don't you understand that?" 

"I want to protect you just like any mother would for her own child."

"I understand that, but you have to let me live my own life. I don't understand what happened to you these past few years. You used to be so easygoing. You let me do my own thing, but lately, you've been almost clingy. Isn't it a bit late to start doing the mother thing? I'm thirty-one, not three."

"I know. I don't understand it myself, other than to say I'm getting older. I feel like I'm missing something. I don't know what it is. I've been on retreat after retreat but it's still so confusing. I'm so angry with myself!" Naomi sighed with irritation, then slowly sipped her tea. 

Blair picked apart a paper napkin. He looked up and softly said, "Could it be that you need to settle down, Mom? Buy a house? Find a guy? Get a steady job and just be my mom?" At Naomi's responding deep sigh, Blair added quickly, "There's nothing wrong with that, with wanting a home and family. Jim and I..." 

Naomi looked intently into Blair's eyes, making him blush. "You and he wouldn't want me around. I would be an intruder."

"Jim isn't like that. He'd be happy to have you around if you could be a friend to him, and not an interference. You have to understand Jim. He's kind and loyal and loving, but to outsiders, he's all ice and prickles. You have no idea how tender and sweet he is with me."

"I'm not doubting his affection for you, Blair, but I also remember how he treated you after that mess with your thesis. He cut you off without a kind word. He was cold and plain nasty to you. Sure, he was polite to me, but I saw how much he hurt you. I don't understand what happened but I don't buy that he's changed his colors that much." 

"You have to understand. Jim doesn't like anybody knowing how he feels inside. He suffered a lot as a kid so now he's very careful who he lets in. I consider it a privilege that he trusts me."

"But does he really, Blair?" 

"You have no idea, Mom." 

"Why don't you tell me?"

"A lot of stuff is private between Jim and me. I couldn't discuss things without his permission. Listen. Jim's who and what I want. He's who I'm going to spend the rest of my life with, no matter what. We're totally committed. You have to accept that," Blair paused, but he had to say what he felt was right, "or you have to leave me alone."

"You can't mean you'd choose Jim over me?"

"Damn it, Naomi! I don't want to choose anybody over anybody else! I don't get it at all. Choose? What the hell is wrong with you? Is it because Jim's a guy? You're homophobic? You think if it weren't for him I'd be getting married and having kids?" Blair sat back and said sadly, "You don't know me at all." 

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I really am. It's not that Jim's a man." Naomi huffed out a shaky breath and after a glance into Blair's unhappy eyes, she finally admitted, "Okay, it's because Jim's a man. It's because you're a man. I just never even considered that you'd be gay! You never said anything. I need some time to adjust, that's all."

"But you've had gay friends for years! What's so different about me and Jim?"

"Things are always different when they're affecting your own flesh and blood. You have to understand that I don't disapprove. I'm a bit surprised, that's all. I'm happy that Jim treats you well. At least, you think he treats you well." 

"That's it." Blair rose swiftly. "Again, you seem to think you know how and what I feel. I think he treats me well? What the hell is that supposed to mean? You know what? I'm going back to the hospital. I'm kissing my lover good night. Then I'm going home to sleep, so that when I pick him up in the morning to take him home, I won't look like death warmed over. Good-bye, Naomi." Blair walked out of the small cafe before Naomi had a chance to respond. Right now, he just couldn't take any more of this conversation. 

Blair's steps didn't falter when he heard Naomi's voice call, "Blair! Please! Please wait." 

Just as the automatic doors leading into the hospital slid open, Blair stopped and his shoulders slumped. "What do you want from me?" he asked sadly, sensing Naomi coming up behind him. "Maybe I can't be the son you want. That you need." 

"Blair, please," Naomi said softly, placing a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry. I don't understand what I did, but I'm sorry. Maybe you could explain it to me. I'm willing to listen." A warm hand touched his arm. "I don't want to lose you. I love you." After a small pause, her quiet voice asked, "Do you love me?"

With a shake of his head, Blair responded, "Of course. You know that."

"Do you know that I love you?"

"Yes, but maybe that isn't enough. Not right now, anyway." Blair shrugged and turned to face his mother. 

Naomi's restless fingers smoothed the front of his shirt. "Please, Blair, come and stay over at Miranda's. She's out of town, and I have the entire house to myself. You're in no condition to drive yourself and it's not safe. You're practically asleep on your feet." When Blair didn't respond, she added, "I'll run you back over in the morning, then you can get your car and take Jim home. Please, sweetie. I'd really be grateful if you'd let me play mommy tonight." Naomi gave Blair a warm smile. 

Blair considered her offer for a moment before he slowly nodded. "Okay. It would feel good to be taken care of tonight. It's been a hell of a week. But first, I have to go and say goodnight to Jim." 

"I'll wait right here. I'm parked right across the street. So go. Kiss your man good night. Tell him I said to sleep well."

Blair nodded, managing a small smile. He'd almost forgotten how charismatic Naomi could be when she turned on the charm. "Okay, you win. Give me fifteen minutes." 

"Take as long as you like. I'm not going anywhere."

\-----------------------------------------------

Blair slowly pushed the door open to Jim's room, treading carefully in case his partner was asleep. In the dim light, Blair could see that Jim's eyes were closed but when he started to walk toward the bed, they fluttered open. 

"Blair?" he said sleepily. 

"Hey, Jim. Did I wake you?"

"Nah. I was just dozing. This place is too noisy to sleep much anyway." 

"Do you want me to run home and get your white noise generators?"

"Don't bother. I'm getting out of here in less than twelve hours. I'll live."

"I'm so glad." 

"Me, too."

They looked at each other, grinning with pleasure. Jim held out his hand to Blair, who laced his fingers with Jim's. "I can't wait to get home. I want to feel you next to me. I need you." 

Blair climbed on the bed and pulled Jim's hand to his own chest. "Me, too," Blair murmured, laying soft kisses on the side of Jim's face. When Jim leaned into his touch, Blair scooted closer and Jim moved forward until his head was resting on Blair's shoulder. With their hands still joined and held between their bodies, Blair used his free hand to stroke Jim's soft hair. He was very careful not to put any pressure on the bandaged arm. 

"You're going to be okay. I'm right here." Blair knew that his tactile mate needed him close right now so they held each other for a long time. Gently stroking Jim's head and back, Blair whispered, "Better?" 

"Yeah," Jim whispered in return, minutely rubbing his cheek on Blair's shirt before settling back against his partner's body. 

Blair patiently held Jim close until he finally relaxed and his body grew heavy in Blair's arms. As he started to drift into sleep, Blair gently guided him back against the pillows. "I love you." Blair kissed Jim's forehead before placing a peck on the end of his nose and another tender kiss on his lips. 

"Love you, too. Think I'll sleep now," Jim murmured drowsily. 

Blair's fingers stroked Jim's face until he was sure his lover had drifted off. Rising and adjusting the sheet, Blair placed a final kiss to the middle of Jim's forehead before he left to find his mother. 

\-------------------------------------------------

"It's 8 o'clock, Blair." Naomi's soft voice woke Blair gently. 

Blair groaned, burying his head in the pillow. "I'm awake." 

"Breakfast, sweetie?"

"Yeah, sure. I'll catch a shower and be out in ten."

"You want a tofu omelet?"

"God, I hate tofu," Blair said with another groan. "Anything else, please. Wheaties. Toast. Anything but tofu."

Naomi laughed. "Just kidding. I'm making cheese omelets." She gave Blair's head an affectionate pat before she left, leaving behind the fragrance of sage. 

She must have spent the entire night meditating, Blair mused, rolling over and rubbing his hands down his face. Jim comes home today! Blair grinned and hopped up enthusiastically. He looked for his clothes from yesterday, but they were gone, replaced with clean jeans and a brand-new royal blue chamois shirt. 

"Where in the hell did she get clean underwear?" Blair wondered aloud, grabbing the boxers and new socks. "Naomi, what am I going to do with you?" he said with loving exasperation. 

Blair took a quick, hot shower, shaved with the new disposable razor and brushed his teeth with the new toothbrush. Feeling like a 'new' man, he sauntered out into the kitchen, sniffing deeply. 

"Smells great," Blair said, wrapping his arms around Naomi's waist and kissing her cheek. "Thanks for letting me crash here last night." 

"For you, sweetie, anything. You know that." 

"I know, Mom. It's just sometimes, you're so exasperating." Blair poured coffee into the two mugs that Naomi had set next to the freshly brewed pot. He took the cups to the table before returning to the counter to butter the toast that had just popped. Putting the bread on a small plate, he set it on the table and slid into a chair while Naomi slipped a fluffy omelet onto each of their plates. 

"I'm starving." Blair dove into the food. "I guess I forgot to eat last night." Shrugging, he snagged a piece of toast and munched happily. 

"You're in a good mood."

Nodding, Blair wiped his mouth on a napkin. "Jim's coming home today!" 

Her face brightened. "He makes you happy," she stated.

"Well, yeah. I thought I told you that."

"You did. It's just seeing it on your face is different than you telling me. You positively radiate happiness!" 

Blair blushed. "Geez, Naomi. That's so embarrassing. I'm not some blushing schoolgirl."

Covering Blair's hand with hers, Naomi said, "No, but I've never seen you in love before. You've introduced me to friends over the years, but this is completely different. Even your aura is wonderful."

Blair finished the last bite of omelet. "It's still a bit embarrassing for my own mother to notice. It's a good thing that nobody at work has. I didn't know I was so transparent."

"Blair, sweetie, I'm your mother. The people at work don't know you like I do. They'd probably never notice but I see it," Naomi smiled, "and it's wonderful." 

"Okay, enough with the motherly examination already," Blair pleaded. Rising he poured another cup of coffee for himself and Naomi. Sitting back down, he sipped quietly for a few moments, enjoying the flavor. 

"Blair?" 

"Yeah?"

"Are we okay?" Naomi asked tentatively. 

"Depends. I don't mean to sound harsh, but can you do it? Can you be my mom but not my warden or my guardian angel or my judge and jury? I need a mother. I don't need the rest."

"You're very forthright, but then I taught you to stick up for what you think is right. Honestly, Blair, I'd like to try again. I'll do my very best to adhere to the boundaries." Naomi looked down at her hands resting on her lap. "I'm asking for another chance with you. And with Jim."

Blair moved to stand behind Naomi's chair. He wrapped his arms around her neck and leaned down, kissing her cheek. "I'm willing to try again. We'll have to ask Jim, but I'll bet he's willing also. Deal?"

"Yes," Naomi said quietly, wrapping her hands over Blair's. "I love you." 

"Me, too, Mom. Now, if I don't get going, I'm going to be late." Blair planted a loud kiss on the side of Naomi's face, making her laugh. "Jim's waiting." 

"Okay, sweetie. Let me grab my keys and we'll go." Naomi rose and followed Blair toward the door. He waited while she made a stop for her purse and coat. Walking next to each other down the sidewalk, Naomi said, "After I drop you off, I could go to your place and cook something for you and Jim. It would be ready for dinner tonight."

Blair held up his hands. "Naomi, thanks, but no thanks. The last time you cooked in the loft, Jim itched for two days." Blair watched his mother from the corner of his eye and was pleased to see that she wasn't upset at his comment, but was actually teasing him in return. 

"Are you disparaging my cooking?" she said with a giggle. "I'll have you know that I can cook at least two things expertly." She hit the remote control on the key ring, unlocking the electric doors. 

Climbing into the passenger side, Blair laughed. "I'm not saying anything even remotely personal about your cooking, but I'll handle dinner. Trust me on this. In a few days when Jim's feeling better, we'll have you over for a meal and we'll talk. How's that sound?"

Naomi started to protest, but suddenly she fell silent. "That will be nice. Call me when you want to make plans." 

Surprised that Naomi hadn't pressed further about cooking, Blair saw the battle waging on her face for a moment and saw her make a decision even if it went against her motherly instincts. He felt great relief when he realized how hard she would indeed try not to interfere with his life any longer. "I will. Thanks for offering to cook. And thanks for the ride." 

Naomi smiled. "You're a good son. I'll do my best to be a good mother and friend." 

Blair smiled and said sincerely, "I know you will." 

\-------------------------------------------------

"I've asked you all to this meeting today so that we can discuss certain incidents that have occurred in the past few weeks," Simon Banks said formally. "This is the time and place to air any problems or grievances that any of you may have with Ellison and/or Sandburg." 

The members of Major Crime were spread around the room, listening intently to their superior officer. Brian Rafe and Henri Brown lounged against the window ledge, sharing a bag of potato chips. Megan Connor sat on Simon's left, sipping a diet soda. Jim sat directly to Simon's right, with Blair sitting next to Jim. Blair had fetched coffee for himself, Jim and Simon. Rhonda sat, pencil in hand, ready to make notes in case her boss asked for any follow-up procedures or for any further information that needed to be gathered. Joel Taggart sat next to Megan, drinking bottled water. The two newest members of the Major Crime team (although neither was new to the police force) were Mark Fernandez and Ann Marie Duncan. 

"Okay, people. Jim Ellison is back to work. He'll be riding a desk until his doctor's appointment later this week. If he's cleared, he and his partner will be back on the street come next Monday." Simon clamped a cigar between his teeth and chewed it thoughtfully. "I've thought about this and have decided since we're all adults, I'm conducting this meeting as such.

"Do any of you have a problem backing up Jim Ellison or Blair Sandburg on the street? If you do, tell me now, because if anything happens that makes me the least bit suspicious about any of my people's behavior, there will be hell to pay and that hell will personally come from me."

Jim sat stoically in his chair, head up and face unreadable. Blair sat still, for Sandburg, that is. Only the pen he twirled in his fingers betrayed his nervousness. Henri and Rafe had come over to stand behind Jim and Blair. 

"I'm proud to back-up Jim and Blair any time, any place," Henri said. 

Rafe nodded. "That goes for me, too. They've saved my ass too many times for me to make any judgments on their personal life. Besides, I like them both." 

Joel cleared his throat and looked directly at Blair while he spoke to the group. "You guys know that Blair is the closest thing I've had to a son. He's helped me through several rough patches, especially with the bomb scares. I'd trade my life for his." He gave Blair a warm smile. 

Blair felt his throat tighten. He swallowed and nodded. "Thanks, Joel. You mean a lot to me, too." 

Joel nodded to Blair before turning to Jim. "The same goes for you. I've known you for years, Jim, and I wish nothing but the best for you. Anytime you need me, you call."

Jim nodded. "Thank you," he said simply, knowing Joel would understand all the unspoken things that he couldn't say, but that he felt and tried to convey with a look. 

Understanding, Joel gave Jim a dazzling smile. "You're welcome." 

Fernandez rose. "I'm pretty new here, but Ellison and Sandburg pulled my butt out of the fire on that Middleton hostage situation. I'm on the team, 100%. I'm with Taggart, Rafe and Brown. Call on me anytime." He shuffled his feet. "What they do in their off time isn't any of my business." 

Megan looked at Ann Marie, who met her eyes and raised an eyebrow. Ann Marie quickly looked away, making Megan swallow. 

"Captain, there's something I need to tell you," Conner said. 

"Yes?" 

"I think I made a terrible mistake."

"What is it? You'd better explain yourself, Inspector," Simon demanded. 

Megan nodded. "It was stupid of me. I was in the loo with Ann Marie, after, you know, it happened, and I mentioned to her..." At Simon's unhappy look and raised eyebrow, Megan said, "I know! It was incredibly naive but I was just telling her how sweet I thought it was!" Megan blushed bright red and glanced through her lashes at Blair and Jim. "I’m really sorry," she said to Ellison and Sandburg. "I didn't know that one of Officer Mills' friends was in the ladies' room with us. It was very wrong of me to have talked about any of my fellow officers behind their backs. I didn't mean to hurt anybody." Tears welled in Megan's eyes, and she roughly brushed them away. 

Simon glared. "Why didn't you say something to me sooner?"

Megan sighed. "Until I heard all the details I didn't realize that what I'd done was the cause of the problem. I knew about the investigation, of course, but I was wrapped up in the Gorsinki kidnapping. I didn't put two and two together until I spoke to Blair just yesterday. I'm really sorry."

"Inspector, this action demands some sort of reprimand," Banks said. "I'll talk to you in my office in private about your behavior when we're finished here."

"Yes, sir," Megan said. 

Blair and Jim exchanged quick glances. Blair nodded and Jim cleared his throat. 

"Sir, I'd like to say something, if I may," Ellison inquired. 

"Go ahead, Jim. This affects you and Sandburg the most."

Jim nodded. "Connor might have flapped her lips when she shouldn't have, but she's not responsible for Mills and what happened. Blair and I don't want any kind of retribution. We're only concerned that when push comes to shove, we can count on back up. All we want is what we're willing to do ourselves for the rest of the team." 

Blair gave Jim an approving smile before he said, "You all know Jim and I would do just about anything for you guys. We deserve to know if you're willing to watch our backs. That's not too much to ask."

Henri and Rafe both spoke at once. "You can count of us." "We're part of the team." Grinning, they slapped each other on the back. 

"Thanks, guys," Blair said to the duo. 

Megan said, "I hope I'm still welcome as part of Major Crime. It's become like family to me."

"We're lucky to have you, Connor," Jim said. 

After sitting quietly since the meeting began, Detective Duncan finally spoke. "I'd like to apologize for my part in gossiping with Inspector Connor. It won't happen again and, yes, every member of Major Crime has my full support. I consider it an honor to work with all of you." Turning to Jim, she said, "Ellison, I'm really sorry for having any part of what happened and that you were hurt. If there's anything I can do, please don't hesitate to ask." 

Jim nodded at Duncan. "As long as my partner and I can count on you from here on out, that's good enough for me." 

"Yeah, me too," Blair added. "We all make mistakes. I'm happy that it's over and Jim's okay. Knowing that our friends are behind us helps more than you'll ever know." Blair looked at each person in turn. "Jim and I want you to know that we appreciate your support. Thanks." Blair's gaze met Jim's. "That's from both of us." 

Simon cleared his throat. "Ellison. Sandburg. You have my full support as your supervising officer. I understand that we don't have control over the rest of the force, but if Major Crime sticks together, I think mostly everyone else will follow our lead on this." 

Murmurs of assent were heard, making Simon nod in approval. 

"Okay, people," Simon said. "I hope we've all learned a lesson here today. This isn't kindergarten! Let's be professional and do our jobs. Now get to work." Simon crossed his arms, looking quite pleased with himself over the meeting's positive outcome. "Some of us have bad guys to catch and some of us have a lot of paperwork to do." Simon glanced at Jim, pointing a finger on the last part of his statement, making Blair giggle and smack his partner's arm. 

"God, I hate paperwork," Jim muttered. "It's got to be time for lunch." 

Simon smiled at his detectives' banter and followed to supervise. 

\------------------------------------------------- 

Blair gave a surprised gasp when the shower stall curtain was unceremoniously pushed aside in the middle of his aria. Entering the shower, a very nude, very aroused Jim latched a strong hand on the back of Blair's neck and clamped their lips together. Blair's hands fluttered for a moment before finding purchase on his naked partner's backside. They kissed for a long minute before Jim released Blair's soon-to-be thoroughly ravaged lips and grinned evilly. 

Blair managed to catch his breath, blurting out, "What?" at the hungry look on his lover's face. 

"It's been three fucking weeks. Twenty-one long, dreary fucking days. Five hundred and four hours, give or take a few fucking minutes." Jim growled once before claiming those enticing lips again. Only after thoroughly exploring his partner's mouth as deeply as possible, did Jim release his trembling lover. 

"Shit, Jim," Blair muttered, "I'm sorry, man. I just wanted to be careful. Make sure you're completely healed and all. I've been worried about you." He leaned against Jim with his hands splayed over the hard chest muscles. 

"Me, too, Chief. Worried when and if I'd ever get you to fuck me again. Long and hard. Over and over. Now. Don't make me have to ask again." 

Towering over his lover, Jim gave Blair a thoroughly lecherous look that said, don't fuck with me now or you'll die. Either that, or it said, fuck me now or die. Blair couldn't quite decide, so he grinned foolishly and plunged ahead. 

Blair nodded happily, water running in his eyes. "Oh, man. Sorry!" He swept wet hair from his face. "I think I can handle it." With that, Blair moved closer and grabbed Jim's balls firmly, making Jim gasp. "You want to go to bed?"

"No," Jim said adamantly. Grabbing the tube of waterproof lube, he squirted an over-flowing mound into his hand. 

Blair's eyes grew wide before narrowing quickly. The blue changed dark and lustful in a heartbeat. His body quickly responded to Jim's advances, and he pulled Jim's hand to his own hardness. 

Jim leaned over and turned off the shower while his lube-filled hand firmly grasped Blair's fullness. When Blair clamped a hand behind Jim's head, Jim met Blair's lips halfway. The kiss was dirty and deep, hard and rough. Blair latched onto Jim's tongue and sucked hard, making Jim whimper. 

With the lube sloppily spread over his hot flesh, Blair released Jim's lips. Licking a drop of blood from his own lips, Blair's eyes met Jim's. He drank in the naked need pouring from the icy blue depths. Without another word, Blair pushed Jim against the wall of the shower. He tugged until Jim was leaning against the wall, supported by the palms of his hands. Grabbing Jim's hips, he tickled the back of his lover's knee with his foot. Jim took the hint and bent down slightly, spreading his legs. Blair stepped into the valley, moved a hand down to guide himself into Jim's waiting body, and pushed. 

Jim released the breath he had been holding and relaxed his lower body. When Blair entered in one slick motion, Jim groaned aloud and clenched around Blair's erection. Sensing that Jim needed to be fucked instead of loved tenderly, Blair started a hard rhythm, pounding into his lover's ass forcefully on each stroke. 

Jim's arms shook under Blair's fast pace and his own erection dripped in anticipation, throbbing for release. Centering his senses on Blair's body, it wasn't long before he felt his lover's orgasm reaching the point of no return. Panting loudly and grunting on each thrust, Blair took Jim forcefully. Jim reached a shaky hand to his own erection but his action was forestalled as Blair shoved hard and bit down on the back of Jim's shoulder. Jim growled deeply and returned his hand to the wall. Grunting an approving response at Jim's wordless obedience, Blair's hand found Jim's cock and he stroked firmly. 

Blair was relentless, giving Jim exactly what he needed to be taken hard and fast. Both men came with deep groans, one right after the other. Only when Jim was practically senseless from his forceful orgasm, and from the sensation of Blair filling him with his essence did Blair allow them to slip to the floor of the tub. Panting harshly, the lovers wrapped themselves around each other and murmured tender endearments into each other's ears. After long minutes, some semblance of reason returned. 

"Oh, my God!" Jim groaned, flexing his ass muscles. "That was fantastic!" 

Blair chuckled. "I do believe you enjoyed that." 

"I need to be out of commission more often."

"You liked that, didn't you? You liked being taken hard. You liked me pounding into you." 

"Yeah, oh yeah." 

"Cool." 

"Thanks."

Laughing, Blair patted the wet head pressed against his chest. "Sure. Glad to be of service. Now let's get dried off before I turn into a giant goose bump."

Jim laughed deeply at his mate. Sitting up, Jim placed his hands on Blair's face and bestowed a gentle kiss on Blair's red, swollen lips. He rose, flinching a bit. 

"Sore?" Blair asked condescendingly. 

Jim raised an eyebrow. "Yes, thank heavens."

Blair chortled and after wiping the semen from them with a clean washcloth, he wrapped Jim's cooling body in a large bath towel. Jim returned the favor, wrapping a thick towel around his partner and rubbing briskly, bringing warmth to Blair's rapidly cooling body. When Jim's hand wiped the dampness from Blair's groin, he was surprised to find that Blair was hard again. 

"Chief? Already? I'm not enough for you these days," Jim said laughingly, squeezing the reawakened erection. "Remind me of how young you are and how old I am, why don't you?" Jim's amused eyes feasted on his lover's blushing face. 

Blair stepped back. "Oh, no, man. It's not that! Trust me. That orgasm sucked brain cells out." Blair shrugged. "I guess I missed you a lot." Blair gave Jim such an innocent grin that Jim had to laugh again. 

Making sure his cold-sensitive lover was fully covered, Jim gathered up a large handful of towel at Blair's chest and guided him from the bathroom. When they reached the living room, Jim arranged Blair on the rug in front of the brightly-burning fireplace. He tucked a pillow behind his head and like unwrapping a treasured gift, he exposed Blair from his terrycloth cocoon. 

"Warm enough?" Jim whispered. 

Wide lust-filled blue eyes met hot clear blue. "Yeah." 

"I'll make you warmer." Jim's gaze traveled down Blair's body and lit on his erection. 

Nodding, Blair sighed and closed his eyes. "Please-"

Before Blair could say another word, Jim's mouth engulfed the head, making him gasp. Treating his cock like a giant treat, Jim licked, sucked, nibbled and tasted until Blair was trembling and spurting hot come into Jim's throat. 

"Oh, God. Oh, God," Blair muttered over and over, clenching his hands into fists while he came into the furnace of his lover's mouth. 

Releasing the now limp member, Jim sat up and grinned, thoroughly satisfied. "How was that?" he asked needlessly. 

"Oh, my God," Blair said again. "That was wonderful." He sighed deeply and with great satisfaction. "My favorite thing," he murmured, words full of sleep. 

"What's that?" Jim asked tenderly. 

Yawning, Blair whispered, "Seeing your face just before I fall sleep. So beautiful..." 

Grinning widely, Jim reached out for another pillow and an afghan from the nearby sofa. He arranged his pillow close to Blair's and covered them both with the blanket. Snuggling close, Jim laced his fingers with Blair's and watched as Blair slipped into sleep. He kissed Blair's cheek and forehead before settling down to sleep as close as physically possible to his life partner. Satisfied, content, happy and alive.


End file.
